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Number 8 Life is sexually transmitted. Number 7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 6 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. They can’t tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich. Number 5 Give a person a fish and […] A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check. He marched straight up to the counter and said, ‘Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I’d really rather have a job.’ The social worker behind the counter said, ‘Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a […] “Late again,” the third-grade teacher said to little Sammy. “It ain’t my fault this time, Miss Crabtree. You can blame this’ un on my Daddy. The reason I’m three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!” Now, Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years. Despite her mounting fears, she asked little Sammy what […] These classifieds actually ran in newspapers – a smile for your day… FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER . 8-years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites! FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor’s dog. FREE PUPPIES.. Mother, AKC German Shepherd. Father, Super Dog..able to leap tall fences in a single bound. FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. Looks like a […] ACTUAL AUSTRALIAN COURT DOCKET 12659—CASE OF THE PREGNANT LADY A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the […] For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day when you just need to take it out on someone!!! Don’t take that bad day out on someone you know, take it out on someone you DON’T know!!! Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I […] Two black guys are at a bar talking, one says to the other, ” you ever noticed after you have sex with a white woman that your eyes burn, your nose burns and you get all teary-eyed?” The second black guy says, “yeah, all the time.” The other says, “why is that?” The second says, […] |
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